On the 2016 Democratic Nationwide Conference, former First Woman Michelle Obama addressed her household’s haters: “When they go low, we go high.”
It’s a easy but profound motto she and her household adopted to handle those that act cruelly, and so they’ve chosen to reply with dignity, precept, and style somewhat than stoop to their bullies’ degree. It was one thing the household wanted to get by the extreme scrutiny of former President Barack Obama’s marketing campaign and presidency.
When requested about this mantra throughout an episode of the Name Her Daddy podcast with Alex Cooper revealed Wednesday, Obama clarified it’s not about suppressing feelings like anger or ache towards scrutiny, however somewhat about being “outcome determinative.”
Practically a decade after that 2016 viral second, Obama’s clarification lands in a political and cultural setting outlined by prompt reactions and performative outrage—a time when “going low” can carry engagement, consideration, and even votes. Particularly in an period during which highly effective figures have platforms to precise their feelings—whether or not it’s anger or celebration—it’s important to take a step again and suppose earlier than you act, she argued.
Management and having a platform is “like a gun,” Obama mentioned. “Learn how to use it, put the safety lock on. Because you can cause a lot of damage, but you can also do a lot of good.”
Obama additionally clarified that this doesn’t imply leaders shouldn’t really feel emotions. Relatively, she argues, leaders ought to suppose earlier than they communicate and take into account “where you are trying to go with them and let that lead.”
This helps leaders to keep away from public “tantrums,” as she referred to as them, and current as extra composed and coherent. Not solely does the previous First Woman use this mantra in her present ventures, like Larger Floor Productions, a manufacturing firm based by Michelle and Barack Obama, nevertheless it additionally interprets to her private life.
The kitchen desk might be the proper place to air out frustrations, however folks typically over-exaggerate their issues, turning them right into a degree “10.” However once they take a step again, Michelle Obama mentioned, the issue might not be as unhealthy as was first thought.
“You’ll find out that half the stuff you threw out there in anger isn’t even true, and it’s not how you really feel,” Obama mentioned. “So now you should go out and communicate what you really feel, really clearly. To me, that’s what going high is.”
This theme of self-determination can be omnipresent in Obama’s new ebook, The Look, which additionally explores her fashion evolution, id, and presentation. Her method additionally aligns with an government management faculty of thought that emotional regulation—not suppression—drives efficiency and belief. It’s the muse of emotional intelligence, an idea popularized by psychologist Daniel Goleman, as important to main successfully beneath strain.
“If your emotional abilities aren’t in hand, if you don’t have self-awareness, if you are not able to manage your distressing emotions, if you can’t have empathy and have effective relationships—then no matter how smart you are, you are not going to get very far,” Goleman wrote in his ebook Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter Extra Than IQ.
What different leaders say about taking the excessive highway
Obama’s perspective resonates with enterprise leaders who view emotional management as important to accountability.
Simon Sinek, well-known for his 2009 TED Discuss in regards to the idea of “why,” and his “Golden Circle” concept, warns in opposition to leaders displaying vanity and narcissism, as a substitute advocating for composure.
“The job of a leader is to serve the people and the mission, not your own ego,” Sinek wrote in a September 2025 weblog submit. The very best leaders are “the ones who give away credit, take responsibility, and serve quietly, even when no one’s watching.”
Microsoft CEO Satya Nadella throughout his tenure has additionally centered on reworking the tech big’s tradition from a “‘know-it-all” tradition, centered on defensiveness and vanity, to one in all “learn-it-alls.”
Microsoft should “stay humble, stay hungry, and exhibit a growth mindset,” Nadella informed Fortune’s Jeremy Kahn in 2024.
Whether or not in politics, company boardrooms, or public life, Obama’s “go high” mantra serves as a reminder that management isn’t about reactive power—it’s about disciplined intention.
